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Hamster in a disaster zone

May 24, 2013

The kids, all five of them, are still sleeping, so I finally have some time to write…

Wait, five??? Yep.  My three plus a couple extras who spent the night, fully prepared to help today.  Yesterday afternoon, I set up a slide show of the tornado destruction and explained why it was better that they didn’t help right away.  The extra girls wanted to help immediately when they found out about the barn being destroyed and they were a little discouraged when I told them they had to wait, because they wanted to be right in the middle of the action and, you know, Girl Power! Plus it’s just silly to do nothing but make sandwiches….

It’s amazing how seeing the pictures made it clear that we didn’t need to “help” while all the Big Mess was being removed, and with a couple of careful statements on my part, they also understood why it was important that we were just there to serve lunch and tea. I am not particularly church-y, but the idea that the older women should teach the younger ones is one I take very seriously.

“’Cause you know how hungry your brothers are after football practice, right? Now imagine how hungry they would be if they had practice all day long!”

“Doesn’t your dad get a little crabby when he’s working on stuff in the shop and it isn’t working out like he likes?”  (yeah) “So you can see why sometimes it’s a good idea to just stay out of the way, right?”

Simple, effective illustrations of important Red Pill concepts, and by the time we are done picking up sticks and working the garden, they will have big appetites and I will complete the lesson with a big meal… If you have sons who might one day come across the path of one of these girls, you’re welcome.

Moving on to talk a bit more about Ian’s post yesterday, Red Pill Marrige: When “Make Me A Sammich!” Means “I Love You!”  If you have read my posts here and here, you know that it came as quite a shock to me that Ian characterizes my relationship as a “solid Red Pill relationship”, but I trust his wisdom, so I am going to Own It!

On to the more salient point here, in light of my other posts…

Regarding my observations through the clean-up process (Ian’s words):

“The respect that LadySadie detects is genuine, and it’s not because her Beau is adept at keeping his woman quiet and in the kitchen.  The respect is the honest tribute due a man who has managed to build a relationship strong enough with a woman so that she respects HIS need to handle his manly business, with the implied reciprocal agreement that he respects HER need to handle her womanly business.  They aren’t giving him respect because he’s being oppressive, they are paying him respect out of admiration for his ability to build a sturdy House.” 

True, my “beau” (I’m going to save myself some typing and just call him B) is anything but oppressive, or overbearing, or any other negative that some feminist twit or mangina would probably label our synthesis during the very dangerous and difficult process of cleaning up the mess.  BUT, that is because he is recovering from a blue pill hangover…  His actions during this minor crisis were specifically not those of a whimpering beta.  His friends (also not consciously red pill guys) ultimately let him act as final authority, but they all collaborated and consulted throughout the process. I found the whole thing to be strangely sexy.  It isn’t very often that the kitchen window functions as a window into the secret world of men.

“…the visible support of women for men while they are working adds both incentive and validation of their effort.  Men thrive on female gratitude for honest, hard work done on their behalf.”

Indeed.  The gratitude was obvious, but the pats on the back went mostly to Beau.  I was rewarded with thumbs-up and an empty platter where a pile of sandwiches once stood.  At first, though, I was met with some token resistance.  Not for interfering with work, though, not much, anyway.  It was this, “You don’t have to do that, we can go to town.” And, “That’s too much trouble.” Finally, “Are you sure you don’t mind?” It was as if they were worried that I would be holding my efforts over B’s head or some other blue-pill man-hamster was trying to figure out my motives. As I came to understand later, it was because they were truly baffled that I was there to support their efforts. That Is Sad.

Ian covered it a bit, and I didn’t make a big deal out of it when we were emailing privately, although now, in hindsight, perhaps I should have…


LadySadie points out that while she and her girls were being helpful and supportive, a couple of the men who had graciously donated their time, tools, talents, and trucks to help were repeatedly harassed by text or phone by their wives.  Each text or call doubtlessly slowed down the effort.  When men are working, we like to WORK, without interruption or distraction.

Here is just some of the snowflake-attention-whoring I was privileged to witness…because the more I think about it, the more it infuriates me!!!!

R is the best friend. We don’t know each other well, but I can tell you that we have come to a place where we love-hate each other.  R is mid-thirties, never married, no kids, his attention-whore, fat, lazy, entitlement princess girlfriend (AW) is 22. R and AW live about 3 miles away on his farm so she has to drive past B’s farm on her way to and from her grueling 12 hour a week job.  She pays no bills, and does no chores on R-farm except to keep the living room and kitchen clean.  The kitchen is clean because she refuses to use it.  R has to get take-out on a regular basis because AW is, lazy. (Keep in mind that during planting season, R normally has 16-18 hour days, and is still expected to fetch food from town if it wasn’t for the heavy rains, R would have been in the field, not helping B.)

Upon finishing her dreadful 4 hour shift Monday, AW noticed that my truck was at B’s farm, around 11 am.  Her texting telebitching (H/T Ian) began.  It took until around 2 pm for R to put his phone in his truck for the rest of the day. R is the guy who told me, “Bitch we need some tea”… It wasn’t a civil comment, but I don’t even think he was really talking to me when he said it.  His misplaced anger in the form on a “rude” comment to me was directed at her and he gets a pass.

Day two, Tuesday: R did not eat with us for lunch.  It turns out he had utter hell to pay for eating lunch and supper Monday, when AW had demanded he bring home supper from town.  Instead, he worked from 8:30 am, after he fed his livestock, until noon when we ate.  He went to town to get a part for his tractor and got food at the convenience store.  He came back to work in the afternoon then left at 5:30 to go get supper for AW, who had by then left to go to her friend’s house to have some drinks. I served supper at 6 pm, and work on the barn rubble continued until 9 that night.  W.T.F?  Upon discovering that AW had left for town, R went to check his field to see if he could continue planting, but instead he decided to mow the yard at his place while AW was out drinking…

R worked his ass off for B, because he is a good friend.  I know now that AW was ruthless in berating R, not for helping B, but for eating food that I prepared.  She never even stopped by to make sure that his needs were being attended to. What A Bitch.  Jealous little snowflake; so horribly abused because he was fed in exchange for hard work.  (Beat you head on your desk, here if you would like.)

Now, I am worried (not really, but a little) that R’s AW hates me, and she has resisted any and all efforts to ever meet me. Good lawd, I am old enough to be her mother… where does the vitriol come from?  I am no threat to her.  All I did was make some food.  I am dying to know why R puts up with her utter bullshit.

On the plus side, S (rich farmer dude, bachelor) got several meaasges from a woman he had “seen” a few days earlier who wanted to set up another time to see him.  She knocked it off when he said he was busy.

Greatest compliment of all: Uncle J, close to 70 years old, didn’t hesitate to come ask me for a slice of pie at the end of the day.  His comment was this, “I know I am an old man; I talk about mom way too much, but this is the first time in years I have seen a woman do what she would have done.  Now, where is that pie???”

  1. Pat Bello permalink

    You sound like my wife of 33 years.
    That is a big compliment.

  2. Pat, that is a wonderful compliment, thank you!

  3. cutefirstofficer permalink

    A compliment from someone like Uncle J would have had me higher than a kite for days – it’s the way things *should* be done but today, not so much among most females. Like you said – So Sad. The only thing we can do is to train our daughters properly. Love how your blog encourages us and sending thanks. Your words are inspiring.

    About the AW chickie – my bet is yes you are indeed a threat to her no matter how close in age you mention. You are conducting your life in a fashion that clearly and prominently displays where AW is seriously lacking – and AW has got to sense this, my guess is based on what R has probably raved about (most likely repeatedly – ha) in her presence. As a result AW is, quite naturally, threatened. Makes one wonder if R will wake up and smell the coffee – his having encountered someone like you – knowing there are good women out there. He has got to envy your B. 😉 Maybe that’s why he has a love/hate relationship w/you. Again sending thanks for your words!

    • cutefirstofficer,

      Indeed, I was very flattered by Uncle J’s compliment. As for R, yes, he has caught on, and he doesn’t like what he’s getting out of his relationship with AW. I am increasingly disgusted with the way that R is treated, He is a good guy and deserves much better. As is apparent by my post, I am trying to teach my girls and their friends that men have value and skills that should be appreciated. I am just mystified that 20-somethings like AW (who I know was raised better) are such entitled bitches in reality. She treats R like he should be her Daddy and ATM, while offering nothing in return. She just needs someone to show her that she simply has to recognize that R needs an ASSET, not a dependent!

      I do not think that AW thinks I am a threat, Rather, she resents me for setting the bar higher than she wants it to b -, even though she could easily do the same things I am doing now. I am her nemesis for no other reason than R does compare what I do to what she is doing… but this is a developing story… stay tuned,..

      Thank you for all your kind words, blessings on you and your Captain!

  4. sqt permalink

    I sure hope R comes to his senses and leaves AW before she gets pregnant and picks his pocket for good.

    I never call my husband at work. He’s a busy guy and doesn’t need me hassling him all day. We have an agreement that if he gets a call at work while we’re talking that he can more-or-less hang up on me to catch the other call and no hard feelings will result. He doesn’t actually hang up in my ear, but I’m fine with an abrupt “I gotta go.” How demanding and insecure do you have to be to keep tabs on your man all day?

    And cooking is a no-brainer. If a women doesn’t want to cook, clear or have kids- why would a man want her?

    • Great timing, sqt! R may figure it out, but (see newest aborted post) I was just going to write about it. Damn Weather!!!

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